Liesel's Ambitions: Update

Irma wrote me to say I have been quiet lately and she's right. I have been posting on my blogs, but nothing personal. So what am I doing right now? Well with the start of February I will only be working one day a week at the job I do now and I hope to fill the rest of the time with homecare (taking care of eldery in their own homes). The salary is double so it seems to make sense. In November I worked in homecare as well (one night a week) and earned more then the 5 days I worked at my present work! As you could have read a few posts ago I want to straight out my life. I have so much on(?) my head, I need to clear everything. I started tyding up my bedroom and I can't tell you how much better I feel now that I, first of all hoovered under my bed! And secondly that, apart from two boxes, I don't store anything underneath it anymore so you can actually see the floor! Yay!


Short Term
T cleare my head: tidy up my room
- I have one box with "charity shop", one box with "paper recycle" and one box with "to organize" box written on it.

Step two: Sort out my "to organize" box

As you probably know I have travelled for two months this year. We traveled until my money was gone (and then a bit more). When I came home last August I had no money and no job. What I should have done before I left is asked work for unpaid leave. To have no money at all of your own is one of the worst experiences of my life. To be reliant on the charity of other was awful. I know they didn't mind -they are the kind of people that would go through fire for me- but I felt horrendous. Sometimes I will go to the supermarket with dad. I put things I want in the basket (chocolate, kitchen paper etc) and dad does the same. I don't mind getting as many things as I like as I know I can pay for them, but I also know that when we reach the cash till and I offer dad that I pay he always refuses and dugs away when I try and put a ten euro note in his breast pocket. Now those two months where I didn't have money I could not make myself to put things I needed (desperatly) in basket because I knew I wouldn't be able to pay for them. Dad wouldn't mind, but I would. Now that I think back, perhaps I am too proud? Is that it?

So what is she rambling about, you probably ask yourself. Well, those two months made me realise what I want to be in life: independent. I want to be reliant solemnly on myself. That means money wise, but also being to put a nail in the wall, grow my own vegetables, make my own clothes and when my car breaks down I can repair it myself. That's my goal. It doesn't have to happen overnight, but bit by bit I know I will get there.


Long term
First stop is paying all my outstanding bills.

It's a burden on my shoulders and once I paid all of them I will feel so relieved!

Second stop: Savings.

I saw Suze Orman the other day on Oprah and she is quite an inspiration! Thanks to her my second step is to have savings enough to be able to live eight months without income. To know that you have 'an apple for the thirst' as we like to say over here =)

Have you fallen asleep? I wouldn't blame you, you know :0)

With the turmoil of the last 18 months I'm feeling as if things are gently beginning to settle down (touching wood). I'm also reading "The Purpose Driven Life" which gives me hope for the future and hopefully by the end of the book I will 'know'.

To my BNA friends you mean the world to me, I wouldn't be the same person without you.

To everyone else, thank you for visiting my blog. You brighten my day with every comment you make.

Thank you!


With lots of love, Isabella (Liesel)